“I think we should talk too,” Caitlin said.
Still holding her hand, Jay led Caitlin to the couch and lowered her to sitting before taking his seat on the cushion beside her. “I’m sorry,” he said.
Caitlin’s heart threatened to gallop. She hated this sort of fight, but knew her husband’s energy well enough to know it was coming anyway. He didn’t want to argue, and because he was a peacekeeper, Jay would do just about anything to keep their bickering to a minimum if not bury it before it began. But his mind needed to be as clear as his conscience, so like always he would say what was needed even if it left blood in her ears.
“I wasn’t trying to insult you this morning,” Jay said, rubbing his hand on top of hers. “You asked me a direct question and I gave you a direct answer. Then you got mad. It’s not fair when you do that.”
“I know,” Caitlin held her chin straight, “and I wasn’t trying to be unfair. I just didn’t expect you to call me a whore.” She said the word whore with a slight sneer. The twitch at Jay’s lip made her sorry she said it at all.
“I didn’t call you a whore. I said that sometimes men wanted to do with their wives as they please. Me included. I was drawing a parallel. It’s unfair to take it out of context.”
“Why don’t you grab a sharpie and go write my number on the wall in the bathroom next to a crude picture of some cock and balls!”
“That’s not fair.” Jay looked down like he always did when Caitlin hurt his feelings.
“I’m not trying to be unfair, Jay. But how do you expect me to feel? Do you think that makes me feel good when you tell me I should be your whore? Do you think that’s a compliment? Am I supposed to get excited, jump up-and-down, say, YAY!! My husband wants to fuck me like he has to pay for it!?”
“No, I don’t. But I do expect you to listen to my answer after you ask an uncomfortable question. That wasn’t easy for me, you know.”
“Why not?” Caitlin yelled. “You’re the one who gets to say you want to fuck me by the hour.”
“I would appreciate it if you didn’t scream at me, especially when we’re not home alone, and just put our children to bed.” Jay smiled at Caitlin in the same smug way he always did when he was right she was wrong and both of them knew it. It pissed her off, even though it dimmed her scream to whisper.
She repeated the question, softer in tone and language. “So, why was it hard for you?”
“The same reason it is every time we have this discussion, Cay. You want to know what I want, but that’s only a setup for me telling you and hurting your feelings. Look, I’m not trying to change things, or asking the questions, but as long as you’re asking me I’m going to be honest.”
“And your honest answer is that I’m not good enough?”
“No,” Jay gritted his teeth. “My honest answer is that sometimes the animal in me wants more than you’re wanting to give. However, I’m fine with that. Our relationship isn’t built on sex, and never was. It doesn’t need to be now. We have a wonderful life, a fantastic family, and an enviable marriage. I’m answering questions, not complaining. So stop asking me what I want in bed then yelling at my answers when our children are trying to sleep.”
Caitlin crossed her arms. “It’s not fair that you don’t think I’m good enough!”
Caitlin knew she was pushing Jay too far, so it didn’t surprise her when he stood from the couch. “I’m not doing this with you, Caitlin. Maybe we can revisit this conversation, but we’re inches from a big fight that I’m not prepared for. I just wanted to say sorry, then maybe make love and fall asleep. The last thing I wanted was a sequel to this morning’s argument.”
Jay turned from Caitlin, then headed toward the kitchen as she choked on an apology, angry at both her husband and herself for doing all the wrong things, and having each pointed out.
Caitlin went to her computer and logged onto Facebook, not wanting to follow Jay into the bedroom. She listened for the shower, since Jay took one every evening, even if he showered before work. Caitlin heard nothing. After a quarter hour and still hearing no shower, she figured things weren’t good, and Facebook was only worsening her mood. The network was like ancient Egypt, with everyone writing on walls and worshiping cats.
This argument was stupid. Most of her wanted to march into the bedroom and give Jay the apology she knew he deserved. But the rest of her, the part that didn’t want to budge, was mad at him. His admission left her feeling like a failure, and that the truth of his desire was something she might never be able to give. Wasn’t that one of the reasons people got divorced? Wasn’t a lack of harmony, sexual or otherwise, why marriages eventually crumbled? Wasn’t it only a matter of time before Jay stopped looking at her and started looking everywhere else?
Finally, Caitlin tired of being stubborn. She put her computer to sleep, slid out from the desk, then turned out the lights and went to the bedroom. It was dark inside. Jay was already in bed, his back toward Caitlin, head facing the window.
“Hello,” she whispered. “Jay?”
There was nothing but silence as Caitlin slipped into bed beside him.
It took her forever to fall asleep, trying to keep more good thoughts in her head than bad ones. Her eyes finally grew heavy as she had the sudden epiphany — the same one that had crashed through her mind a hundred times before — that if she could only relax, and not need to feel control through the moment, she might already have everything needed to make both their dreams true.
When she finally fell asleep, sex as it should be was waiting.
Caitlin waited all day to see him, and was burning when he finally arrived an hour before the children. As much as she wanted him inside her, she wanted to show her love by taking his cock into her mouth and sucking it until he lost his load down her throat, even more.
Jay came through the mudroom. She was on his lips as soon as he did, kissing his mouth while rubbing her hands all over his strong chest, before moving her mouth to a nibble at his ear. Caitlin’s tongue fell from her mouth, and she dragged her wet tip from his lobe to the side of his neck, kissing his collar bone as her hands unbuttoned his pants and zipper.
“Welcome home,” Caitlin whispered, as her lips made their way down his chest and stomach, fingers working his pants, freeing his fly so she could tug it to his ankles before running the tip of her tongue along the line of his boxers, hooking a finger inside the waistband and sliding them down to meet his pants in a puddle.
Caitlin pulled out his cock, then trailed her nails up the back of his legs while cupping his balls with her hand from the front. Jay was a pipe and Caitlin a faucet as she gently rolled his balls in her palm, kissing his dicktip before dragging her tongue along its length, making long wet lines across his hip bones, and lightly nipping his skin with the edge of her teeth.
Jay’s dick twitched and Caitlin smiled, taking her time as she slowly curled her fingers around him. She began to stroke him, running her tightened palm up and down his overheated shaft, slowly at first, then faster, gathering speed until Jay was begging for her mouth on his cock.
Caitlin paused, ran her nail from the base of his dick to the tip, and sent sharp shivers up and through Jay’s body, before slowly running fingers up his stomach, kissing his chest while still jacking him below.
Vibrations from her mouth covered his cock in a carpet of pleasure, returning to the tip and sucking hard on his head as moans fell from her mouth like leaves from a tree. Caitlin smiled, looking up at her husband with starving eyes.
She slid his cock from her mouth, wrapped her hands tightly around his shaft at the base, and whispered, “Do you have any idea how wet I am?” then dropped him back in her open mouth, running her wet tongue from tip to base and back.
His dick was drenched and dripping as Caitlin teased him with her tongue, dipping her head and gaining speed by the stroke. Her fingers were as hungry as the rest of her, fondling his balls while her mouth kept working him in long, fluid strokes. Her hand set pressure at his base, still making little circles with her lips while stroking faster; giving rhythm speed.
Her nipples were bullets bouncing to meet the beat of her mouth. She shoved her head down Jay’s entire cock until she gagged, muffled her moan, then grabbed a deep breath and repeated the pleasure.
Jay moaned as his body galloped toward climax. His cock twitched in her mouth as his stroking gathered speed. Caitlin couldn’t wait to taste him. Her tongue whipped from one side of his cock, then slammed it back down her throat. She looked up to find his eyes, because she couldn’t stand not seeing him.
Her hand met her mouth in the middle, craving his explosion. His dick muscles tightened against her tongue, then FINALLY! Salty lava shot from his tip and Jay lost himself to a scream. Cum coated her mouth and mingled with her saliva.
Caitlin looked up, eyes wide, swallowing seed, and looking up at her man with a widening smile, loving how his honey slid down her throat. She took him in her hand, softly stroked his half-soft cock, then kissed the tip and ran her tongue along his length, watching him shudder through his final few rattles.
She stayed on her knees, rolling her hard nipples between her fingers and licking her lips. Caitlin spread her legs, waiting for Jay to recover, knowing it would happen faster if he watched as she fondled her tits and played with her sopping wet pussy.
Caitlin ran her fingers through the short and curlies at the top of her pelvic bone, then sunk them deep into her divinity. She plunged for a minute, then pulled them out, stuck them into her mouth, moaned his name, and smiled as she watched his cock slowly raise and start to twitch, back to hard and ready for more.
She had been ready all day.
Caitlin woke to the sound of her own moaning. As she slowed her breathing she heard the fap fap fap fap fap fap from Jay jacking his shaft beside her. She peeked through her eyelids as he erupted, biting his lip as cum spilled over his knuckles.
He turned to Caitlin and ran his eyes over her body, uncovered with her right hand still resting between her legs. She had no idea if he could see through the thin slits of her eyes, or even knew she was awake.
“Goodnight, Caitlin,” he said, then turned toward the window for sleep.