Lexi Maxxwell Writes Smart, Unapologetic Erotica (Smut For Smart People).

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Filthy Fairy Tales

Dirty Fairy Tales (Finally) Done Right!

Who hasn’t laughed at the emperor as he strutted naked in his “new clothes,” longed for dry land along with the curious mermaid, or felt Cinderella’s desperation to escape her wicked stepsisters and dance with the prince at the ball?

Fairy tales enchant us. But it’s 2013, and we should all know by now that they’re much, much better with dicks and pussies.

Reader pleasing erotica writer Lexi Maxxwell has taken the classic fairy tale to sticky new depths that erotica lovers like you are sure to thoroughly enjoy. With a blend of smart humor, genuine heart, and — of course — giant raging hard-ons, their “filthy fairy tales” are like nothing you’ve read.

The Slutty Little Mermaid
The Slutty Little Mermaid is so loosely based on Hans Christian Andersen’s tale, that the only thing it really has in common with the original is that this story also has a mermaid, and the original mermaid, like our Bianca, probably also wanted a pussy, though Hans was way too uptight to write about that since it was like 300 years before E.L. James wrote 50 Shades. In this filthy version of the classic story, the mermaid Bianca is sick and tired of living under her father, King Piston’s iron fist, and curious about the filthy shit she sees happening with the humans on the orgy boats that sail the seas above her kingdom. The mermaid’s father, being sort of a cock, prevents Bianca from watching what the humans are doing, as well as partaking in any way. Because she’s like every other girl who ever lived (mermaid or not), this only makes Bianca long harder for her pussy. The Slutty Little Mermaid proves that grownup fairytales are better when their full of blow jobs, ass sex, orgies, swapping, and pretty much anything else your depraved mind might think of.

The story of Picockio is so ridiculously awesome, it’s amazing that no one ever thought of it before. With a premise of something that grows larger and larger along with the lies it was really only a matter of time before someone wrote a story with a line like, “That’s right, Picockio, just like that!! Keep lying to me!!” Lexi Maxxwell is thrilled it was her. No lie: This story will scratch every itch in your pants. The tale starts when Giganto, a rather stereotypical Italian inventor, finishes creating his best life’s work ”” a sexbot to end all sexbots ”” and wishes upon a blue star (The Smoking Hot Fairy) for his sexbot to turn into a real man. Picockio is lured through many temptations, the most exciting taking him to Orgasm Island, where our wooden dicked hero gets fucked sucked and fondled until he learns the most important lesson a “real man” can ever learn: It’s always MOST important to please your woman.

Snow White and the 7 Kinky Dwarves
This story is a lot like the original, except everyone in this version is a giant pervert and every chapter has a ton of cum. This story has a wicked queen, but she’s an even bigger cunt than in previous tellings. As in the original, she’s super jealous because she’s no longer the fairest in the land, but this time she finds out from a magic mirror who has been watching Snow White shining her diamond ”” though not until she turned 18, of course. After getting the huntsman to rub her out (insert your own joke) Snow White must escape through the forest. Because the story is well-paced, the princess doesn’t spend too long in the forest and quickly ends up with the dwarves. These are kinky dwarves and not regular dwarves, so there’s a ton of nasty shit ensuing inside that cottage. I don’t want to ruin the story for you, but things do get sticky fast.

Lexi Readers Filthy Fairy Tales! Here’s What They’re Saying:

The Slutty Little Mermaid
“The Slutty Little Mermaid was a very funny and sexy take on the old story. Very different than what the Disney story was,(that was for the children!). I like when Bianca made the deal and ended up on the beach and what came after that was hilarious!! The story was fast moving and kept me smiling the whole time I was reading it! I can’t wait to read the rest of the other Fairy Tales!”

“What happens when you take an every day beautiful, young Mermaid and add sexual curiosity. Lexi and KR Gray take you into the realm of merpeople who live their lives without the parts necessary to have everyday, awesome, raw sex… they live their lives fertilizing eggs and what’s sexy about that. Princess Bianca, daughter of the King of the merpeople wants to know more and after she watches humans have a fabulous sex orgy on a yacht she wants answers… and what she finds will make you twitch and want more with each page. The story is cute, sexy, erotic, loving and hotttt… And how can you combine all that… Read… The Slutty Little Mermaid. Thanks Guys… Great read!!”

Snow White and the 7 Kinky Dwarves
“Snow White is Garden-of-Eden perfect in both mind and body; untouched by Original Sin and wholly unspoiled by the moralistic brainwashing that robs the rest of us of our true sexuality. Sure she is constantly teasing us with her innocent beauty and voracious sexual appetite, it’s what drives the story, but she is also reminding us that random sex with kinky strangers can be a beautiful thing if done with a pure heart. There’s just the right amount of fairy tale danger and suspense (which means that things don’t get boring between the juicy parts), a terrific supporting cast (I liked the Queen), and plenty of snarky dialogue. Within the genre of filthy fairy tales, I’d say it’s pretty darn good.”

“From beginning to end this book will make you laugh, keep your interest and make you twitch. Starts out hot and stays that way all through the book and the kinky dwarves were fabulous. The twists are great and very entertaining!!”

“I had a great time reading Picockio. It’s hilarious, hot and sweet, all at the same time. I enjoyed reading about Picockio’s journey to become a real man (there’s a real lesson there!), loved the appearances of some other fairy tale characters, and the puns, oh, the puns! They guarantee quite a few laugh out loud moments, along with other very well thought scenes that I don’t wanna spoil for future readers!”

“Perhaps puberty would have come even earlier if Maxxwell and Gray had been around back in the day. This Filthy Fairy Tale could not have been read to put anyone to sleep. This telling of the story using descriptions from erotica is just a XXX rated exaggeration of the same story we learned as children. It even contains the same lesson for always telling the truth our parents used. Maybe even a few more “lessons” than were contained in the original tale. While most people typically frown at a pun; the reader will find that frown turned to a smile or giggle sprinkled throughout the story.”

Amazon Reviewers